Project Pollywog: 13 weeks, 6 days
Apr. 8th, 2007 05:22 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
eniarelocinToday marks the last day of the first trimester. So, the overview:
The first trimester was definitely not easy. The last few months, well the last couple specifically, have been increasingly high stress. I, at least, have been pretty overwhelmed with the demands on my time, mentally, and physically. This endeavour has been expensive and will only be more so in the coming months. Every aspect of everything has been a challenge.
Physically speaking, I'm happy to see this first trimester go. As of this last week, maybe week and a half, I've finally seen a decrease in nausea and fatigue. Everyone at work says I look 'brighter' and much less exhausted. Prior to that, I looked like I hadn't slept and felt about the same. I ran the gambit of symptoms from morning sickness to food cravings, dizzy spells to emotional crashing, and, generally speaking, a huge effect of my day to day functionality. I still get nauseous if I don't eat when I need to but I have, at least, adjusted to all of these things and figured out how to prevent them to a large degree. I'm still a hormonal nut case. That has shown no signs of leaving. Even though a lot of this has been pretty rough on me (and I'm sure many have it far worse than I have), I feel I've been very fortunate to have had no red flags or warning signs with regard to miscarriage. I hope this means the baby is healthy and here to stay. We know it's growing and moving, as we've seen in the ultrasounds. And in the last few weeks I've started growing, too. I, officially, cannot button my pre-pregnancy trousers or skirts. Thank goodness for the Bella Band. Also, here, at the end of the first trimester, it's getting very uncomfortable to lay on my back for very long (the official cut-off for side sleeping is meant to be 16 weeks). All in all, I do feel pregnant and may even be starting, slightly, to look it. (Stephen is starting to show a bit, too. Eep)
Nutrition: I have always been picky about things I eat and had a weird diet (to most). Before I moved in with Stephen I was nearly, if not totally, eating vegetarian and definitely eating healthier. I had a huge relapse in all of that when I moved in here for various reasons- partially being a student again, partially from eating what he ate, definitely a lot to do with time and money. Reasons as they may have been, going away from my diet, the one I knew worked, had a really negative impact on my health and certainly on my weight. Prior to becoming pregnant, I had decided that I was tired of gaining weight and feeling like crap all of the time, that I was going to eat the way I knew worked best for me. Fortunately for me, eating anything besides health food and things that are on my list make me feel quite sick, and literally to be sick, within a fairly short amount of time. In the last few months, I have still eaten fish (though in decreasing amounts) but no meat from land animals, am buying mostly vegan products (though I do not claim to be a vegan), have definitely been sticking to organic products whenever possible (almost exclusively), dairy has been nearly eliminated from my diet (save the occasional white cheese and yoghurt), and I'm really cutting out sugar. Oh, and of course, no caffeine, alcohol or smoking. Unfortunately, I am my own desert island of vegetarianism out here and am driving everyone crazy. But too bad. Eating meat makes me fat and unhealthy. Besides, baby seems to really like vegetables.
Relationships: A lot of my relationships have seen some level of change since the beginning of the year (we date the pregnancy from 1 January, 2007 auspiciously enough).![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
squidgyfishlove and I started out feeling much closer to each other, but stress and other issues have been putting a wedge in that for the last few weeks. Many times that closeness is still there and we enjoy talking about the baby together. We definitely, however, have a lot of other factors to deal with, and like many have said having a baby doesn't solve any problems it only magnifies those present. I just wish I could feel a little less alone a lot of times. I have been spending a lot of time with some of my other friends, and some I haven't seen much of for a while prior. I have really enjoyed spending time with them, but the level of closeness we once shared seems to have dissolved somewhat. The people I consider to be my best mates, the people I confide in, haven't changed over the last few years even though I hardly speak to them any more. They are still the ones I want to speak with when I'm feeling vulnerable and need that level of comfort, but I rarely get to. I really miss them. I really miss London- I dream about it almost every night. (I'm sure many of you think I'm pretty silly by this point, and sometimes so do I, but that place is part of me now as are the people I know there.) Some of my relationships here, like with my parents and my brother, have improved but many others have suffered since the beginning of the year. On a pregnancy related note, I think that my new found shortness of temper is at least partially to blame as is my inability to be coherent after about 2300. But, in reality, a lot of it has to do with a decision I made round about New Year's Eve to make some changes this year (but that's another story). I will also mention, as it's only fair, that I have been very moody and a bit more antisocial than I would otherwise tend to be.
I really hope Stephen and I will be able to continue in making this team work thing improve for us. For the sake of our marriage, and for the sake of this little life for which we are now responsible. I hope we can do a good job as parents.
Life Balance: This area has suffered, easily, more than any other during this pregnancy. Fatigue and difficulty focusing have been largely to blame for this. They are this very moment (more the focusing than fatigue). I started university on 29 January this year taking online courses. I'm really wishing I would have held off as soon as I found out I was pregnant (unfortunately, after the semester had began). I have had very few good weeks, meaning that I've been able to keep up on the work load with forcing myself into exhaustion and/or sleep deprivation. The level of work I have put into it, especially when a lot of my symptoms were at their worst, has really been less than what I would consider my usual and certainly not my best. I only have another month to go, but I worry that I've done too much damage to come out of this with a successful mark. It really, really weighs on me. And in trying to get this stuff done, the housework gets neglected. This past week I decided I couldn't handle the state of the house any more and in doing what I could to take care of that, I, in turn, have neglected my coursework. It just seems like there are not enough hours in the day. I really wish I could just hit 'pause' on the universal remote for a while. I wish I could just get caught up some how. At least work seems to be going well... but that's not a big surprise. That is much improved as well with the return of energy I've experienced since spring break. I keep thinking that maybe when university lets out that things will relax and I can stop stressing so much. But I really should get a second job. I just can't seem to make it all work and that puts added strain on Stephen.
The Baby: I think I've hit just about every point on the spectrum regarding this, the most important issue. I've been to elated and back again. I've been completely in despair, thinking I've made some terrible mistake and that there is no way I'll be able to handle it. I've spent a lot of time depressed or just lost in emotion on which I cannot seem to get a handle. I've definitely had a lot of anxiety and self-consciousness about actually being pregnant and the physical ramifications of that (namely my appearance). Overall, I am very happy about the baby. Even though we had planned to get pregnant exactly when we did, it's something we've talked about for a long time, and something I have definitely wanted. The responsibility and my ability to handle it definitely scare me a bit, but I am very much looking forward to meeting this little person and getting to know them. Oh, and I'm totally stoked about finger painting. I know it's a little way off, but that was a dream I had a while ago. She (always in my dreams it's a girl) and I are downstairs painting, covered in paint- hands, cheeks, paper, clothes, good and messy- and Stephen comes down stairs, raises an eyebrow, and then smirks at us. I like that. I know it's going to be a huge challenge, but I think it will also be a lot of fun, and I really hope it is.
Looking ahead: In this coming trimester, I'm really looking forward to being able to actually feel the baby move. That could be as close as a few weeks away, or as far as July. I know it's different for everyone, but I really hope it's sooner rather than later. There are still times when I wonder if I somehow made all of this up in my imagination and am just getting fat or something. I should hope that fetal movement would put that to rest. Also, I would like to look very definitely pregnant and not just like I'm packin' it on. I'm sure I'm asking for trouble there, as Stephen likes to remind me, because by that time I'm likely to be becoming quite uncomfortable and wishing for the time when I didn't or won't have a bowling ball in my abdomen. Oh well... I'll just complain about that when I get there. Right now I'm looking forward to it.
I'm sure as every month passes the anxiety regarding impending parenthood will grow with my belly, but I'm also looking forward to seeing the signs of baby's coming around the house. I want to be prepared. I'm looking forward to nesting a bit, and to having the time to do it.
I hope the rest of this goes well... and better than it has.
The first trimester was definitely not easy. The last few months, well the last couple specifically, have been increasingly high stress. I, at least, have been pretty overwhelmed with the demands on my time, mentally, and physically. This endeavour has been expensive and will only be more so in the coming months. Every aspect of everything has been a challenge.
Physically speaking, I'm happy to see this first trimester go. As of this last week, maybe week and a half, I've finally seen a decrease in nausea and fatigue. Everyone at work says I look 'brighter' and much less exhausted. Prior to that, I looked like I hadn't slept and felt about the same. I ran the gambit of symptoms from morning sickness to food cravings, dizzy spells to emotional crashing, and, generally speaking, a huge effect of my day to day functionality. I still get nauseous if I don't eat when I need to but I have, at least, adjusted to all of these things and figured out how to prevent them to a large degree. I'm still a hormonal nut case. That has shown no signs of leaving. Even though a lot of this has been pretty rough on me (and I'm sure many have it far worse than I have), I feel I've been very fortunate to have had no red flags or warning signs with regard to miscarriage. I hope this means the baby is healthy and here to stay. We know it's growing and moving, as we've seen in the ultrasounds. And in the last few weeks I've started growing, too. I, officially, cannot button my pre-pregnancy trousers or skirts. Thank goodness for the Bella Band. Also, here, at the end of the first trimester, it's getting very uncomfortable to lay on my back for very long (the official cut-off for side sleeping is meant to be 16 weeks). All in all, I do feel pregnant and may even be starting, slightly, to look it. (Stephen is starting to show a bit, too. Eep)
Nutrition: I have always been picky about things I eat and had a weird diet (to most). Before I moved in with Stephen I was nearly, if not totally, eating vegetarian and definitely eating healthier. I had a huge relapse in all of that when I moved in here for various reasons- partially being a student again, partially from eating what he ate, definitely a lot to do with time and money. Reasons as they may have been, going away from my diet, the one I knew worked, had a really negative impact on my health and certainly on my weight. Prior to becoming pregnant, I had decided that I was tired of gaining weight and feeling like crap all of the time, that I was going to eat the way I knew worked best for me. Fortunately for me, eating anything besides health food and things that are on my list make me feel quite sick, and literally to be sick, within a fairly short amount of time. In the last few months, I have still eaten fish (though in decreasing amounts) but no meat from land animals, am buying mostly vegan products (though I do not claim to be a vegan), have definitely been sticking to organic products whenever possible (almost exclusively), dairy has been nearly eliminated from my diet (save the occasional white cheese and yoghurt), and I'm really cutting out sugar. Oh, and of course, no caffeine, alcohol or smoking. Unfortunately, I am my own desert island of vegetarianism out here and am driving everyone crazy. But too bad. Eating meat makes me fat and unhealthy. Besides, baby seems to really like vegetables.
Relationships: A lot of my relationships have seen some level of change since the beginning of the year (we date the pregnancy from 1 January, 2007 auspiciously enough).
squidgyfishlove and I started out feeling much closer to each other, but stress and other issues have been putting a wedge in that for the last few weeks. Many times that closeness is still there and we enjoy talking about the baby together. We definitely, however, have a lot of other factors to deal with, and like many have said having a baby doesn't solve any problems it only magnifies those present. I just wish I could feel a little less alone a lot of times. I have been spending a lot of time with some of my other friends, and some I haven't seen much of for a while prior. I have really enjoyed spending time with them, but the level of closeness we once shared seems to have dissolved somewhat. The people I consider to be my best mates, the people I confide in, haven't changed over the last few years even though I hardly speak to them any more. They are still the ones I want to speak with when I'm feeling vulnerable and need that level of comfort, but I rarely get to. I really miss them. I really miss London- I dream about it almost every night. (I'm sure many of you think I'm pretty silly by this point, and sometimes so do I, but that place is part of me now as are the people I know there.) Some of my relationships here, like with my parents and my brother, have improved but many others have suffered since the beginning of the year. On a pregnancy related note, I think that my new found shortness of temper is at least partially to blame as is my inability to be coherent after about 2300. But, in reality, a lot of it has to do with a decision I made round about New Year's Eve to make some changes this year (but that's another story). I will also mention, as it's only fair, that I have been very moody and a bit more antisocial than I would otherwise tend to be.I really hope Stephen and I will be able to continue in making this team work thing improve for us. For the sake of our marriage, and for the sake of this little life for which we are now responsible. I hope we can do a good job as parents.
Life Balance: This area has suffered, easily, more than any other during this pregnancy. Fatigue and difficulty focusing have been largely to blame for this. They are this very moment (more the focusing than fatigue). I started university on 29 January this year taking online courses. I'm really wishing I would have held off as soon as I found out I was pregnant (unfortunately, after the semester had began). I have had very few good weeks, meaning that I've been able to keep up on the work load with forcing myself into exhaustion and/or sleep deprivation. The level of work I have put into it, especially when a lot of my symptoms were at their worst, has really been less than what I would consider my usual and certainly not my best. I only have another month to go, but I worry that I've done too much damage to come out of this with a successful mark. It really, really weighs on me. And in trying to get this stuff done, the housework gets neglected. This past week I decided I couldn't handle the state of the house any more and in doing what I could to take care of that, I, in turn, have neglected my coursework. It just seems like there are not enough hours in the day. I really wish I could just hit 'pause' on the universal remote for a while. I wish I could just get caught up some how. At least work seems to be going well... but that's not a big surprise. That is much improved as well with the return of energy I've experienced since spring break. I keep thinking that maybe when university lets out that things will relax and I can stop stressing so much. But I really should get a second job. I just can't seem to make it all work and that puts added strain on Stephen.
The Baby: I think I've hit just about every point on the spectrum regarding this, the most important issue. I've been to elated and back again. I've been completely in despair, thinking I've made some terrible mistake and that there is no way I'll be able to handle it. I've spent a lot of time depressed or just lost in emotion on which I cannot seem to get a handle. I've definitely had a lot of anxiety and self-consciousness about actually being pregnant and the physical ramifications of that (namely my appearance). Overall, I am very happy about the baby. Even though we had planned to get pregnant exactly when we did, it's something we've talked about for a long time, and something I have definitely wanted. The responsibility and my ability to handle it definitely scare me a bit, but I am very much looking forward to meeting this little person and getting to know them. Oh, and I'm totally stoked about finger painting. I know it's a little way off, but that was a dream I had a while ago. She (always in my dreams it's a girl) and I are downstairs painting, covered in paint- hands, cheeks, paper, clothes, good and messy- and Stephen comes down stairs, raises an eyebrow, and then smirks at us. I like that. I know it's going to be a huge challenge, but I think it will also be a lot of fun, and I really hope it is.
Looking ahead: In this coming trimester, I'm really looking forward to being able to actually feel the baby move. That could be as close as a few weeks away, or as far as July. I know it's different for everyone, but I really hope it's sooner rather than later. There are still times when I wonder if I somehow made all of this up in my imagination and am just getting fat or something. I should hope that fetal movement would put that to rest. Also, I would like to look very definitely pregnant and not just like I'm packin' it on. I'm sure I'm asking for trouble there, as Stephen likes to remind me, because by that time I'm likely to be becoming quite uncomfortable and wishing for the time when I didn't or won't have a bowling ball in my abdomen. Oh well... I'll just complain about that when I get there. Right now I'm looking forward to it.
I'm sure as every month passes the anxiety regarding impending parenthood will grow with my belly, but I'm also looking forward to seeing the signs of baby's coming around the house. I want to be prepared. I'm looking forward to nesting a bit, and to having the time to do it.
I hope the rest of this goes well... and better than it has.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2007-04-09 12:52 am (UTC)For me the most introspective point was around 18-22 weeks not long after I felt her move I guess; until then the impending birth was this thing off in the distance, but just past the halfway mark and I realised that it was real and it was time to start making proper plans! Everyone is different though, but it is a common point to have those thoughts - just to forewarn you!
My pregnancy dated from 31st December ;-) I felt her move for definite at 16 weeks 2 days - the day of the London Marathon (lateish April), but I'd felt flutterings that might have been her for a few weeks before that. No regular proper kickings until more like 19 weeks (mid May) though.
Sounds like it is all going great for you health wise now you've left the first trimester! :-) Long may it last!
no subject
Date: 2007-04-09 11:51 am (UTC)Like bein' a Russian Doll.
Freaky!
;-)
no subject
Date: 2007-04-09 05:56 pm (UTC)That is freaky!
no subject
Date: 2007-04-10 06:41 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-04-10 07:35 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-04-10 08:18 am (UTC)