Mar. 23rd, 2008

eniarelocin: (Just Born)

Originally uploaded by NicoleRaine
This picture doesn't show Ewan's room, but know this: I've spent all weekend making sure he has one. What does this mean? This means that aside from the filing cabinet and a few things on the high shelf in the closet I've gotten my stuff out of his room. It's not longer Ewan's room/my leftover junk. This morning Papa Joe (my dad) came over and helped me move two bookshelves down into the garage where I've made a work space and framing area... and mostly organized that half of the garage. After that Grammy Tammy (my mom) came over and played with Ewan while Stephen put together the nice wooden bookcase that Grammy Tammy (my mom) bought for Ewan. Ewan giggled and squealed with her for quite a while... and then they took a nap together. Stephen may think a lot of this stuff is 'my stuff' but I'm really doing it for Ewan.

Ewan is nearing 5 1/2 months old. He's changing every week and every day. Every day his eyes are a little brighter, everyday he's a little more with it. He says his own version of 'I love you' which sounds something like "I uuh ooooo" or some variation. He says mama when when he wants me (especially when he's with someone else) and 'meh' still means that he's hungry.

He's remembering things better now. I think that long term memory might be kicking in. It's not just motor skill development now. He's learning how things work. Last week he learned how to make the frog on his car seat toy play music. Yesterday I was showing him which buttons on his mobile make the music and today he tried to push them.

He wants our food. He really wants our cups. He knows how to drink out of cups even though he can't hold big ones on his own really. We need to get the little dude a sippie cup and every day it's getting harder to hold off from feeding him solids and things.

He's practicing sitting up on his own and can for some seconds, sometimes nearly a minute, before listing over to one side or another... or heading face first for his toes which he likes to suck on when he's on his back. He's pushing up when he's on his tummy but hasn't figured out what to do with his legs. However, he does try very hard to propel himself in whatever direction he likes to go. He'll be on the move in no time. This, coupled with Spring Break, fueled the urgency to give him his own room. Beyond this, I hope it will be more comfortable for whoever comes over to watch him at any given time as it's easy to get and feel displaced in our house.

His sleeping patterns are all off and crazy. He doesn't want to be nursed to sleep as much anymore or even rocked to sleep many nights. He wants to be flat and so I've been letting him go to sleep on his own in the crib. Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn't. One thing I do know is that for some ridiculous reason he won't sleep through the night if he goes to bed before 11pm, but he will if goes to sleep after 11. I don't get it. Tonight he fell asleep around 9 and I couldn't wake him up. I sat him up several times and he rolled his head around and flopped his arms... but wouldn't wake up. And so he's in his crib even though I know it means punishment for me later.

Ewan is an amazing little dude. I am constantly battling with my overdeveloped ambition and being his mother. It's a struggle everyday, but he always comes first. I always want to be everywhere yesterday, but he reminds me to slow down and not stress out so much. Doing uni and trying to do the business thing has really been a challenge for me in the last few months. I don't really know where things are going. I think it about it constantly... when I'm laying in bed at night and should be sleeping... and the only answer I have is that he is the most important thing there can be. I may not always know the right answers or exactly what the right thing is, but I try to do the right things for him. I really hope I can do a good job.

He's such a sweet, inquisitive boy. He has a sensitive soul- he feels everything, you can tell. He loves music and singing. He likes looking at pictures. He's bashful and yet such a flirt. Despite all my secret hopes, he's definitely into pretty girls. I hope that I can help him grow and nurture all of these wonderful qualities.

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June 2010

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